LOST-Theories.com

Imagine me saying something deep here.

— Quarantine

No theorizing. No snarky comments. No metaphysics. No wormholes.

Here is what we’re doing today. We are looking for the funniest answer to this question:

how many others does it take to change a lightbulb?

Sample answer: Two. One to fetch it from the black box, and one to convince you that it isn’t really dark out.

I’ve been reading your theories and comments for months, and I know there are some witty people out there. So…lets have at it.

Joke together, be serious alone.

Key characters

Short Name Full Name Episodes Theories
Desmond Desmond David Hume 2.23, 3.17, 4.5 860
Jack Jack Shephard 1.1, 1.5, 2.11, 1.11, 1.16, 1.20, 3.9, 3.22, 3.1, 4.10, 4.12, & 3” href=”/episodes/theres-no-place-home-parts-2-3/”>4.13 1460
Kate Katherine “Kate” Austen 3.6, 1.2, 1.3, 2.9, 1.12, 1.16, 1.22, 3.15, 4.4, 4.12 714
Sawyer James “Sawyer” Ford 3.4, 2.3, 2.6, 2.13, 1.16, 3.10 455
Sayid Sayid Jarrah 2.14, 1.9, 3.11, 4.3, 4.12 391

Key episodes

# Title Aired Central character Theories
2.11 The Hunting Party 1-18-2006 Jack 70
2.6 Abandoned 11-9-2005 Sawyer 69
1.17 .. in Translation 2-23-2005 Sun, Jin 62
1.5 White Rabbit 10-20-2004 Jack 144
1.2 Pilot, Part 2 9-29-2004 Kate, Charlie 205

Comments

  1. jazprof Nov 25, 2007 12:59 p.m. Comment: 1
    1. Just one as long as it’s Ben. If Ben needs a light-bulb changer, there’ll be one striding out of that jungle and into camp any day now.

    2. Zero. Cause Jacob doesn’t like technology.

  2. Annie79 Nov 25, 2007 5:03 p.m. Comment: 2

    Three: one to get permission from Ben, one to actually screw the bulb and, of course, one to observe!

  3. ozzig Nov 25, 2007 5:10 p.m. Comment: 3

    Annie ?!!?

  4. jazprof Nov 25, 2007 5:22 p.m. Comment: 4

    Hah! Annie, did you mean as in Juliet is going to have to ultrasound the lightbulb later! :-D

  5. Katydid Nov 25, 2007 5:37 p.m. Comment: 5

    One to screw it in and then keep it a big secret from everyone else.

  6. lockeko Nov 25, 2007 8:29 p.m. Comment: 6

    A: None, light bulbs don’t burn out on mystery island.

  7. Annie79 Nov 25, 2007 10:46 p.m. Comment: 7

    Oh my, that did sound bad, didn*t it!! lol

  8. spirit_of_jazz Nov 25, 2007 10:58 p.m. Comment: 8

    at least 3: ben, to manipulate the group thinking the first lightbulb has blown (creepy music), someone else to fetch the new one from storage in the temple, & one more to make sure locke doesn’t blow it up.

  9. AngeloComet Nov 26, 2007 2 a.m. Comment: 9

    How many Others does it take to change a lightbulb? Just two. One to go to the tail section and draw up a list. The second to go to the fuselage section and draw up a list. Return in two days. The chosen candidate (Claire) will have to have her baby removed before she can get up the ladder and change the bulb. Just make sure Alex ‘the lover of the dark’ doesn’t mess up the plans. . .

  10. ozzig Nov 26, 2007 5:26 a.m. Comment: 10

    Awards go to:

    Best last liner: Spirit of jazz

    Most complicated: AC

    Most surprising (and probably the funniest because of that) : Annie

    I really do hate to admit it, but I guess these things can be useful after all, like part of a work-out routine. You don’t lift the weights or jump into the aerobics until you’ve done the warm-up and stretching of the muscles first, so this can be like warm-up and stretching of the brain. Then you can move on to some theories until you finally make it up to the heavy duty ones.

    Well, theoretically, at least. Laziness can’t be discounted.

  11. katesawjack Nov 26, 2007 7:18 a.m. Comment: 11

    It would only take one

    If he was an inventive one

    The likes of say Edison

    Going the speed of light is bad for your age.

  12. katesawjack Nov 26, 2007 7:28 a.m. Comment: 12

    I forgot to plus you, two.

    @ Annie ; - }

  13. YouAllEverybody Nov 26, 2007 10:23 a.m. Comment: 13

    Just one…..Mikhail….if he gets electrocuted he’ll just get up 5 minutes later and try it again.

  14. Quarantine Nov 26, 2007 3:15 p.m. Comment: 14

    You guys are cracking me up. And Annie, all I can say is that you sound like a fun date. Everybody wants to know, though; did you want to be at the swan or the orchid?

    Thirty-six. One to hold the lightbulb and 35 to twist time and space around it.

  15. Occam Nov 28, 2007 8:27 a.m. Comment: 15

    Q: How many others does it take to change a lightbulb?

    A: “None! They only have to change lightbulbs because they are all a bunch of pharisees!! Mwhaaahahahaaa!!!!” — John Locke

  16. magpie Nov 28, 2007 9:03 a.m. Comment: 16

    Q: HOW MANY OTHERS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGElightbulb?

    A: NONE! THE WHOLE WORLD revolves AROUND THEM!

  17. solarchap Mar 30, 2008 1:05 p.m. Comment: 17

    you sound like a fun date!”

    I imagine you don’t get many of those then!

    I know a guy at university like you, he doesn’t get out much either.

    Anyway here’s one for you:

    How many Quarantines does it take to get a date with a real woman?

    In an infintie multiverse with every conceivable event taking place somewhere, it would still never happen.

    Do correct me if I am wrong though.

  18. RyanDeall Apr 4, 2008 7:33 p.m. Comment: 18

    all of them, plus some survivers they kidnapped. they would need a huge operation in which mickeal would hold a grenade and not die, go through an electric gate and not dying and finally getting shot with a arrow and not dying

    WHY WONT HE DIE

  19. X May 22, 2008 6:51 p.m. Comment: 19

    ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    It would take 1.

    The first guy to get the light.

    The other to get the bulb.