The Four Toed Statue - Answered
−5 15 Votes
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By WillsDad
- The Four Toed Statue - Answered
- Created: Nov 6, 2007
- Last updated: Aug 14, 2008
- After episode: 2.23: Live Together, Die Alone
- Status: Current
- Flag this theory:
Like today, big government contracts went to the lowest bidder
— WillsDad
We have obsessed and theorized about the 4 toed statue. At last, like Moses from the mountaintop, I bring answers.
The statue was built by an ancient civilization who, like our castaways, found the island quite by accident.
They, too, discovered the mysteries of the island, but, in pre-scientific times, attributed the mysteries to gods, whom they sought to honor with a statue, much like the Colossus of Rhodes.
Like today, big government contracts went to the lowest bidder. The ancient architect who got the statue building contract was a complete incompetent who got the number of toes wrong.
Upon being revealed at a big ceremony involving feasting on boar and sacrificing virgins, the high priests and chieftains immediately recognized the error, and had the statue destroyed. The demolition project also went to the low bidder, which explains why the job is incomplete to this day. In the local island TV news expose (Channel 4815162342 News), he is quoted as saying that as soon as his labor difficulties and problems with the Hostiles are cleared up, he intends to finish the job.
No word on the original architect, one Richard Alpert.
Key events
| Theme | Relevant Episodes | Theories |
|---|---|---|
| Four Toed Statue | 214 |
I prefer the idea they got started on building, made the foot, and then noticed they’d only put four toes there and gave up.
Thus the rest remained incomplete.
Amusing.
Well somebody didn’t get the joke. I just got dinged with a -1.
Geez. Lighten up peeps.
(and AngeloComet: that statue is not incomplete, it is BROKEN)
It’s incomplete.
It’s a lasting testament to a cock-up.
Its destroyed, destroyed I tell ya!
WillsDad, It would have been funnier if you had left out the part about them destroying it, I think. Just my opinion, for what it’s worth…
funny one
Lol Will I’m going to plus you to make up for it!
Well, thanks, MrsSawyer, I appreciate the support.
BTW, your original “amusing” reminded me very much of how my ex-wife reacted to my jokes.
Sorry Will its the famous British reserve coming out :-)
British Reserve? Isn’t that the group that’s trained to surrender to Germans?
Boom boom.
WD, no thats the french
The French need no practice.
i think you might be on to something ;)
+1 for the laughs
Look at that score! I think we’ve all learned a valuable lesson here about trying to joke around with people about something as serious as LOST.
I feel like I should apologize. I’ll probably get over it, though.
+1 for the humour!
You made milk come out of my nose when I was eating my time loops.
Mmmmm. Nose milk….
I saw a war movie once, where the sergeant is training raw recruits, and he introduces them to their weapons, and he tells them to never forget that their weapons were built by the lowest bidder.
Come to think of it, I think I read about Alan Shepard (showing my age here) sitting on top of an Atlas rocket thinking something like, “There I was sitting on top of so much kerosene and liquid oxygen that nobody was allowed within 3 miles of me, when it hit me - this thing was built by the lowest bidder.”